A differentiation switch of bone marrow mesenchymal stem/stromal cells (BMSCs) from osteoblasts to adipocytes contributes to age‐ and menopause‐associated bone loss and marrow adiposity. Here it is found that osteocytes, the most abundant bone cells, promote adipogenesis and inhibit osteogenesis of BMSCs by secreting neuropeptide Y (NPY), whose expression increases with aging and osteoporosis. Deletion of NPY in osteocytes generates a high bone mass phenotype, and attenuates aging‐ and ovariectomy (OVX)‐induced bone‐fat imbalance in mice. Osteocyte NPY production is under the control of autonomic nervous system (ANS) and osteocyte NPY deletion blocks the ANS‐induced regulation of BMSC fate and bone‐fat balance. γ‐Oryzanol, a clinically used ANS regulator, significantly increases bone formation and reverses aging‐ and OVX‐induced osteocyte NPY overproduction and marrow adiposity in control mice, but not in mice lacking osteocyte NPY. The study suggests a new mode of neuronal control of bone metabolism through the ANS‐induced regulation of osteocyte NPY. Normally, norepinephrine (NE) and acetylcholine (ACh) production is maintained at a balanced level in bone, so that osteocytes cannot generate excessive neuropeptide Y (NPY) to favor bone marrow mesenchymal stem/stromal cell adipogenesis rather than osteogenesis. With aging/estrogen deficiency, sympathetic overactivity, and decreased parasympathetic activity cause NE overproduction and ACh reduction, resulting in excess osteocyte NPY generation and subsequent bone‐fat imbalance.